gif of a bull shaking its head the church of eli gif of a bull shaking its head, slightly off timed from the other one


eli roberts is a chosen person, and his will appeared in the form of malcolm the bull.


the bull that eli tried to kill 11 times and killed on the 12th attempt

the attempts

  1. strangulation
  2. bludgeoning
  3. electrocution
  4. bolt gun
  5. stabbed with a sword
  6. cut throat
  7. drowning
  8. run over by a tractor
  9. buried alive
  10. hit by a train
  11. thrown off the top of a car park
  12. bleach


the church of eli accepts all, but to become a full member of the persuasion, you will undergo a physical test of your faith. the nature of the test varies depending on season and mood.

be prepared for anything.

join the persuasion

have your bank details ready.